Episode 2: I did it Again

After the trauma of watching “Phantom Menace,” I wondered if I would be able to handle the next two prequels. My gnawing curiosity about Hayden Christensen got the better of me so I sat down to experience “Attack of the Clones.”

  • Not gonna lie, I’m nervous about this.
  • Ok, I get that Padme is in danger and all, but they just left the decoy queen lying there…
  • Aaaaaand here we have about the same level of energy as the first movie. This is gonna be a long night.
  • Oh Geez… so all young Jedi rock the rat tail?
  • This little tiff between Obi Wan and Anakin is really awkward – but like boringly awkward.
  • Hayden Christensen has dead eyes. Like really dead eyes. Like I think he’s actually dead.5febb233ed8034db74105b1d8dae1bfe
  • The way Anakin talks about how much he missed Padme isn’t sweet or romantic. It’s kind of stalkery.
  • Well, those slugs will be in nightmares tonight.

    Thanks, George
  • “You’re going to be the death of me.” #irony
  • “You don’t want to sell me death sticks. You want to re-evaluate your choices.” I seriously want to be able to do that to all smokers, and men who approach me at the bar. 
  • Ok… at least this movie has a plot.
  • Alright so Anakin gets heated super fast, but his angry isn’t really angry. It’s just… louder.
  • Star Wars Episode 2: Watch Obi Wan go to the libraryjedi-library
  • Ani’s that guy that just will NOT accept that he’s in the friend zone.
  • Awwww look at the Jedi pre-school. Do you think the baby Jedis get naptime? Snacks? Birthday party cupcakes?
  • So Naboo just always has a queen? I dig it.
  • Whoa! Someone let the air out of Voldemort!tumblr_mpnlgyQIiQ1ru3jl9o5_250
  • Sweet Jesus, there was more passion between Luke and Leia than Ani and Padme.
  • They’re LITERALLY frolicking in a field. Bad, George! Bad!
  • Did Hayden go to the same acting school as William Shatner?
  • Did Jango just fire a rocket from his head? Yep.
  • George is seriously a fan of the long, lingering shots. I am not.
  • Direction to Hayden: get angry
    Hayden: just be louder
  • Seriously, something about Palpateen feels off.
  • Definitely going to incorporate “well, shut me down!” into my vocabulary.WBEfg6e
  • The monsters in this movie are cool and unique, but the CGI makes them seem so much less impressive.
  • “I’m programmed to educate, not destruction!” New words to live by.
  • C3PO in battle is me as a soldier – “So sorry!” “Excuse me!” “Oh my!”
  • This movie is really long.
  • Yoda’s battle skills make him look like a baby ballerina. Padme looks like she’s playing laser tag.
  • So they got married. This movie is really weird.starwars_episode2

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