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You Know You’re a Cruise Ship Worker When…

You plan your entire day around crew all aboard time. No one wants their house to leave without them. Getting a stomachache means either sucking it up or risk being quarantined for 72… Continue reading

Why ‘Mad Men’ Makes Me Feel Sexy

And now for something completely different. Don Draper pours an Old Fashioned, Betty lights a cigarette, Ted grabs Peggy by the waist – the sex on ‘Mad Men’ is palpable. At every turn… Continue reading

This Zebra Changed her Stripes

There are politics in any workplace, and I’m still getting a handle on the hierarchy of my land job. On the ship it was easy to see the ranks – uniforms made it… Continue reading

The Love Boat

Cruise ships are full of celebrations: birthdays, anniversaries, honeymoons, weddings, etc. It’s hard not to get caught up in the romance of it all. I found myself sailing the world, travelling to fairy… Continue reading

Goats: Old MacDonald’s Most Ruthless Beast

The following is a true story. The names and places have not been changed because everyone should know this happened to me and it was not funny. Please remove any young and innocent… Continue reading

The 14 Women Who Became My Sea Sisters

When I found myself surrounded by men, I resolved that it would be crucial to have one partner in crime. One confidante. One best friend at all times. Sometimes I was lucky and… Continue reading

A Lady in the Street, but a Bro in the Office

I could not have picked an office setting more opposite from the ship. I can count on one hand the amount of women I worked with at sea. Now I participate in cookie… Continue reading

Hole in the Wall Hangouts Around the World

I spent Sunday laying in the sun while enjoying an adult beverage with land friends (including Kiki). As we lay there gossiping and laughing, I remembered that this was how I used to… Continue reading

The 5 Men You Will Sleep With On Ships

…At least I did. The Christian Grey He is all business. There is no emotion and good luck cracking this rough exterior. He comes out of nowhere and proposes a pitch for intercourse… Continue reading

Rocking the Boat: Sex Below Deck

As the liquor fills your cup, you want your fill of something else. The music pounds at your heart and you wiggle your way around to the gorgeous man who winked at you… Continue reading

Laughing at Ourselves

I have recently begun a weekly tradition with my new land friend, Kiki. Kiki is totally her real name and not the name she insisted I use on this blog. Kiki and I… Continue reading

As the Ship Sails

Remember being a teenager? Remember when every day felt like the most important day of your life? Remember reading Greek tragedies in English class and thinking, “They think they have problems?!” Do you… Continue reading

Nametags: The Double Edged Sword

Lighting up any crew members polyester evening blazer is a shimmering golden badge. During the day, it accentuates that cotton polo tucked into a khaki skirt hiked up to your bra. It tells… Continue reading

What Your Job Says About You

It takes a crew member to spot a crew member. One night in Bermuda a large group of us were enjoying a dinner far away from the dramatic pressure cooker we call home.… Continue reading

Crew Bar – Deck 0

My first contract had ended and I found myself sitting at my grandmother‘s dinner table surrounded by family. I listlessly swirled my fork among the mashed potatoes, daydreaming about all the places I… Continue reading

  • My Travels

  • Instagram of a Landlocked Sailor

    Just a friendly reminder that the hairstyle you rock during your kids' formative years is the way they'll always picture you. Happy Father's Day to the guy with the most impressively flowing locks I've ever known. A Sunday morning at @unitytriangle sets my week off right. Great service today on recognizing the power of the Divine Masculine. Bring it to the forefront and kick butt!! 🕉🕊 Thunderstorms call for an FH Friday. #gettingorganized #gettingideas #spreadtheword #knowfh ❤️ Finally! A drink that speaks to me. #getexcidered Good. Morning. 🐕☀️💤 That's a wrap on the @fhfoundation's day on the Hill! #KnowFH #LittleHillontheHill
  • Hi There!

    Just a girl missing the saltwater in my hair. Let's talk ships.